Drawing 'Second Life'

As most of you know, I recently finished writing my next book, Diary of a Second Life.  I'm in the editing phase now, but instead of just editing, I'm also illustrating certain things.  If I come across something I think that our protagonist might want to illustrate in his diary, I draw it.

Now, I'm no artist.  That will become apparent shortly.  Because I stink, it will provide some verisimilitude when the author of the diary says, "I wish I could draw better."  That's right; because I suck at drawing things, my character will suck at drawing things, too.

Here's a preview of some of the bits of "art" I've finished and can share without being spoilery.

First up, a map.  You'll recall from Lords of Kobol and Displaced that I love mapping things out (click to enlarge):

Next, here's our hero's weapon of choice.  He calls it his "curved blade."

Here are the lockers.  The concept is creepy as hell, but I won't get into that here:

Finally, the ruins of an ancient bridge (click to enlarge):

I later decided to change the location of this river, and because I'm a nerdy stickler, I needed to redo the drawing to accurately match the bridge supports at the new location.  Yes; this bridge, unwrecked, exists (click to enlarge):

More to come later, of course.  Still aiming for a mid-March release.

Sorry

I know it's been a while since I posted anything.  I banked a couple of those "Killing Time" articles a while back so I could bridge the gaps ... I ran out.

Good news is that I'm almost done with my current book.  I'll be finished writing before the weekend and then I'll start editing and rewriting, as needed.  Oh, and drawing.  I need to draw a few things.  It's a diary and the writer draws an occasional picture.  Because I suck at drawing, that means the character who's writing/drawing will suck at it, too.  Authenticity, baby.  Not every illustration should look professional.

Regardless, I'm still on track for a mid-March publication.  As I move forward, I'll post a few more previews.  Maybe another disturbing chapter, maybe a piece of my crappy art.  We'll see.

Killing Time: Annotated MST3K

I've been a fan of Mystery Science Theater 3000 since the mid-'90s ... and we didn't even have Comedy Central on our cable.

My dad was a television repairman.  Doesn't get much work now, as you can imagine.  He traveled to some workshop in a different area that had a different cable system and while he was working on a set, he saw "a show with a guy and some robot puppets watching Amazing Colossal Man."  The riff on the giant syringe (by Tom Servo, I believe: "Where's the giant cottonball?") hooked him.

It was a couple of years before I managed to see an episode myself.  Staying at an aunt's house, I got to see Last of the Wild Horses.  The movie bits were OK, but it was the "Mirror, Mirror" host segments that really ensnared me.  I mean, Mike Nelson as evil Mike, Crow T. Robot singing the Star Trek fight song ("Die-die-DIE, die-die-die-diedie!"), Dr. Forrester & TV's Frank in the theater, Gypsy as Uhura, the flipping Satellite of Love ... good stuff.

Thankfully, a few episodes were available for rental and then the show moved to SciFi, which we had.  Once the Internet became dominant in the late '90s, I was able to find and procure every episode.  (I'm an anal retentive completist that way.)  I started watching one episode a week and it takes me about three years to go through the whole series.

Fast forward a bit and I discovered some really cool sites with info about the show, the movies they watched and more.  Satellite News is a great site for news about the show and what all of the Best Brains are doing these days and Annotated MST is a fun site to use to follow along as you're watching the show in case you hear a riff that gives you the Linda Ronstadt treatment.**

Problem is, Annotated MST doesn't have most of the episodes done.  So, I decided to pitch in.

About a year ago, I started with the KTMA episodes (Season Zero).  I just finished Season One, too.  I'll be starting in on Season two soon.  You can see all of the episodes done here (some of the ones I've finished haven't yet been encoded and uploaded by the webmaster; takes a while, as you can imagine).

How does it work?  Well, I watch an episode of MST3K and have a Wordpad window open.  I type everything they say while they're in the theater.  It takes about an hour to transcribe twenty minutes worth of riffing.  (That's about four hours of transcribing per ep.)  As I type, if I spot something with a reference (meaning, a pop cultural, historical, scientific, etc. -- anything that may need explaining), I put an asterisk under that riff.

Once I'm done transcribing, it's time to annotate.  I go to all of the asterisked riffs and explain what's up.  My only real rule is that I don't try to explain the joke.  This takes a bit longer ... maybe six hours per episode.  Yes, I do this on days when I'm not really planning to write.

Here are a few examples from Episode 105, The Corpse Vanishes:

Why does the Earth have a shadow? –Why are there clouds in space? –Why are we watching this? –Daddy, what’s Vietnam?
Ah, the 1980s. Without the Internet, people had to buy overpriced libraries of books from the Time-Life Company cataloging stretches of history. This line, specifically, refers to a commercial for their History of the Vietnam War series. In the ad, a father and son are at the Vietnam Memorial in Washington, D.C., and the son asks, “Daddy, what’s Vietnam?” Buy the books and find out.
...
Can’t believe those thugs are taking orders from a guy dressed in spandex. –Yeah.
Spandex (also known as Lycra or elastane) was developed by DuPont’s Joseph Shivers in 1959. The name originates with the fiber’s elasticity: “Spandex” is an anagram of “expands.”
...
Meanwhile, hundreds of miles away.
Variations of this phrase originated with cards inserted in silent films of the early twentieth century. In westerns, this was often “Meanwhile, back at the ranch ...” Once audio became a common component, the phrase was still used by narrators for films, radio, and television shows. Most recently, it was used in the various Superfriends animated series of the late 1970s. Narrator Ted Knight or Bill Woodson would say, “Meanwhile, back at the Hall of Justice ...” or “Meanwhile, at the Legion of Doom ...”
...
We gotta go. Carry me back to the ol’ Satellite, Joel. –Carry me, too. –No. –You’ve got legs.
“Carry Me Back to Old Virginny” was written by African-American minstrel James Bland in 1878 and is about a former slave who struggles in the post-Civil War economy. It was Virginia’s state song until 1997, when it was retired because the lyrics were deemed offensive (well, they do include the word “darkie,” after all).

And here's a bit of trivia: what film, book or TV show is the single most referenced on MST3K?  Highlight below to find out:

The 1939 film The Wizard of Oz.

"Why in the name of Zeus would you want to do this?"

Well, I've seen every episode a minimum of four times now.  And there are still references I miss.  I don't like that (see? "anal retentive").  Doing this helps me catch every single joke they throw out there.  I'm getting humor now that I never really caught before.  In the future when I rewatch these shows, I'll remember the annotations and appreciate what it means.

There you go.  If you want to watch old eps of MST3K and you miss some of the references, go to Annotated MST.  It'll help.


** You know, "Blue Bayou."

Welcome!

First thing's first: my name is Trey and I'm a dork.

A few years ago after watching the end of Battlestar Galactica, I knew there were some things I wished had been explored further.  Though I enjoyed the end very much, I understood that the producers and writers didn't necessarily want to answer every question posed.  So ...

I decided to explore the ancient history of the show.  Since I like mythology, that era had some of my biggest questions.  I pondered it for a couple of months and then I thought I would undertake the writing of that history.  Fast forward a couple of years, I've got three books on the matter, spanning more than five thousand years ... the end of which is set some two thousand years before the show and yet inextricably tied.

First, let me say that if you haven't seen all of Battlestar Galactica, perhaps this isn't for you.  (Caprica isn't as necessary to see for these books.)  Skip down to Displaced and read that non-BSG scifi book.

Next, check out this "video" I posted which sort of sets up the books.  After you've read the books, please know that you can hang out here on the blog and check out all sorts of "bonus materials," almost like a DVD. Pictures, maps, commentary and much more.


"But wait," you're saying, "how do I know these don't suck?"  Well, I appreciate your candor.  Feel free to read this collection of reviews to assuage your concerns.

Lords of Kobol - Book One: Apotheosis can be downloaded in just about every imaginable format for FREE at Smashwords here.  Also available at iTunes, Kobo, and B&N.  All for free.

Basic synopsis: introduces you to the gods at the height of their power, as well as the creation and later exodus of the Thirteenth Tribe.

For Book One, here's the post detailing the map in the book, along with a larger version.

Lords of Kobol - Book Two: Descent can be downloaded in just about every imaginable format for FREE at Smashwords here.  Also available at iTunes, Kobo, and B&N.  All for free.

Basic synopsis: primarily a flashback to the gods' descent from Mt. Olympus and the beginning of their reign over mankind, strife between Prometheus and Zeus, etc.

For Book Two, here's a post on the map I made for that book and here's one about asteroid impacts.

Lords of Kobol - Book Three: The Final Exodus can be downloaded in just about every imaginable format for FREE at Smashwords here.  Also available at iTunes, Kobo, and B&N.  All for free.

Basic synopsis: the end of the Lords' dominion, rise of Cylons, the "Blaze," Tomb of Athena and the exodus of man.

For Book Three, here are a few maps (including the City of the Gods), propaganda of the gods and details on the Book of Pythia.

Trilogy-wise (all with major spoilers), here's a post of deleted scenes, a glossary of terms and, finally, an article to address the questions of how I tied the books to the show.  Here's that huge post on the theology of the show and my books.  It includes Book Four spoilers, so beware of that.

That's the trilogy.  But wait, there's more ...

Lords of Kobol - Book Four: Tales From Ancient Days can be downloaded in just about every imaginable format for FREE at Smashwords here.  Also available at iTunes, Kobo, and B&N.  All for free.

Basic synopsis: this is tough.  Essentially, I wanted to explore some things I couldn't in the original trilogy.  This is a completely different version of the story and told in a Tolkien-esque fashion.  There's more mysticism, mythology and so on.

For Book Four, here's the map for this book and here's an article addressing how I tackled certain show-related questions in this volume.

*** For all of the Lords of Kobol books, here's a huge post that outlines the theology of the two TV shows and the four novels.  Please, only read that after you've read the books.  And seen the show.  It's in-depth and addresses many questions.  Very important. ***

Lords of Kobol - Book Five: Of Gods and Titans can be downloaded in just about every imaginable format for FREE at Smashwords here.  Also available at iTunes, Kobo, and B&N.  All for free.

Basic synopsis: we go back to the trilogy with this prequel that details the creation of the Titans and how Zeus and his Olympians overthrew them.

For Book Five, here are the maps, designing the Caesar's seal, the look of Cylons, world-building with language, mythology, real-world theology & history, and a glossary of terms.

ALSO (and trilogy-wide stuff is discussed), there's the prequel trap, the problem with BSG, my workspace, BSG theology 1, BSG theology 2, and a finale Q&A.



BUT WAIT; THERE'S MORE.

Not only have I written these four BSG-related books (free to download, I remind you), but I'm in the process of publishing non-BSG works, too.

Displaced can be downloaded in just about every imaginable format for 99¢ at Smashwords here.  Also available at B&N, Kobo, iTunes, and Amazon.

Basic synopsis: Baltimore cop wakes up in his car on a farm far from home.  Lots of weirdness happens after that.  (Prehistoric animals, robots ... you get the idea.)  Sci-fi, action packed, kind of a mystery.  Think Lost but set on a farm and with a more solid ending.

For Displaced, here's a post with a map of the farm and here's one with another spoilery map and a size comparison chart for the various animals.

Diary of a Second Life can be downloaded in just about every imaginable format for 99¢ at Smashwords here.  Also available at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo, and Barnes & Noble.

Basic synopsis: three centuries after an apocalypse wrought by the undead (yes, zombies), a teen named Wess Marin decides he must leave his insular community in order to survive.  This book details his attempts to leave the past behind and maybe even cure the evil that has destroyed the world.

For Diary of a Second Life, here's post number one on the illustrations, post number two on the illustrations, the original outline and plan for the novel, an article explaining the science of my zombies compared to other fictional zombies and a post on the real-world geography in the book.

Sexcalation, my very adult erotica novel, can be downloaded in just about every imaginable format for $2.99 at Smashwords.  Also available at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo and Barnes & Noble.

Basic synopsis: semi-autobiographical account of a guy getting laid, getting married, trying to get laid with his wife and then the couple becoming involved with the sexy couple who moves in nearby.

(Read the Sexcalation blog, the porn-laden Sexcalation Tumblr and Sexcalation Twitter, all of which are basically inactive at this point.)

The Red Kick, my superhero erotica series, can be downloaded in one compilation from Amazon, Smashwords, iTunes, and Barnes & Noble.

Issue #1 is FREE and can be downloaded from Smashwords.

Basic synopsis: a masked citizen works as a stripper to learn the evil plans of her city's ne'er-do-wells and then gears up to fight them.  Fun "Batman"-style "BIFF! POW! BANG!" narrative both for the fighting action and the bedroom action.



There you have it.  Please, commence the downloading and then the reading.  Feel free to let me know what you think by leaving comments below, following me on Twitter, following me on Tumblr or by 'liking' my Facebook page.

And, please, whenever you buy and download my stuff, don't forget to rate and review.

Thanks for your time.

The Most Frakked-Up Thing I've Written

Well, the title's misleading.

At the time I wrote this, it was, indeed, the most frakked-up thing I wrote.  Since then, things have gotten worse.  (Or better, depending on your perspective.)

In case you don't know, I'm in the middle of writing a novel called Diary of a Second Life.  I won't say much more about it except that it's a diary (derp) being written by a 15-year-old boy.  I expect to be done with it in February, add the editing phase ... maybe published as early as mid-March.

So, here's a portion of the book.  Click on the Diary itself to read it:

The BSG That Almost Was

Last fall, SFX revealed that X-Men director Bryan Singer's planned version of Excalibur was shelved.  Warner Brothers dropped the project because another King Arthur movie was further along.  This means Singer could plow ahead with development on a Battlestar Galactica feature with original series creator and producer Glen A. Larson, as announced back in 2009.  (Didn't happen, though.  Singer moved on to the X-Men: First Class sequel and the project has stalled, likely thanks to Larson's lawsuit, in part.)

That same week, Deadline reported that Universal Pictures made a deal with John Orloff to write the script.  Orloff was nominated for an Emmy thanks to his work on the acclaimed HBO miniseries Band of Brothers, and he also wrote Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hoole.  He is a fan of the show, telling Deadline he built a model Galactica out of cardboard and balsa wood and also saying, "I love BSG, and I would pass on the job rather than frak it up."

"That's swell, Trey," you're mumbling.  You do know that this feature film will have nothing to do with Ronald D. Moore & David Eick's 2003-2009 series and would likely be a complete reboot of Larson's original show, possibly a new version of the pilot, Saga of a Star World, right?

Felgercarb, indeed.

Or maybe not.  Orloff told Hitfix, "I'm a huge fan of the original series and of the second show, too. But I always thought the first show was a little too heavily reliant on 'Star Wars,' you know? Whereas I think the second show was really original and really cool. And I think I've come up with a way to write this movie that won't (frak) any of that up. I'm not sure how much they want me to talk about it. Let's just say it's not what you expect. It will all work in the universe that exists. It will not conflict with anything Ron Moore has done. I don't think you can compete with what he's done."

That sounds nice, taking a cue from '09's Star Trek and all.

All of this big screen BSG aside, did you know that there was a version of new-BSG before the Moore & Eick BSG we all love?  And it was being produced by the aforementioned Bryan Singer?

Yes.  That's a new Cylon.

So, what's the deal?  Why haven't I ever heard about this?


In 2000, Singer and producer Tom DeSanto began negotiating with Universal and by 2001, they were hard at work on a new Galactica series that would have aired on Fox.

This series would have been a direct continuation of the 1978 show, set twenty years into that series' future and ignoring Galactica 1980.  Deals were in place for original cast members such as Dirk Benedict (Starbuck) and Herbert Jefferson Jr. (Boomer).  Sets and props were at least partially built and designs were well-fleshed out, including that of the above Cylons.

All pics and show info from the website Tombs of Kobol:

(That's a half-built Cylon suit.)

Vipers

Viper helmets

Hiding Basestar

Advanced Cylon Raider

Raider cockpit

Galactica hangar

Galactica briefing room or chamber for the Council of Twelve

President Mara's ship (yes, a female president)

Commander Orin's room

Galactica bridge

Bridge set

The famous revolving center console

Aliens ... maybe the Imperious Leader in the center?

Now, story-wise, we know what was up.  I guess I'll say spoiler alert, but since this is a show from twelve years ago that never got made and whatever movie we get will likely be radically different, ... I can't imagine that you really need a spoiler alert.  But still.  Oh, and you might be a bit surprised how much sounds like the Moore & Eick BSG.

Two years after the episode "Hand of God," Galactica's fleet finds Admiral Cain and the Battlestar Pegasus, leading to a mammoth battle that destroys their Cylon pursuers once and for all.  Unfortunately, Cain, Pegasus and Apollo were all lost in the engagement.  Some years later, Adama passes away and Commander Tigh and the fleet weary of their search for Earth and decide to settle upon habitable asteroids abundant with resources which they called New Caprica.  Elsewhere, the Cylons engaged in a civil war between two factions: those who embraced their free will and those who believed it should be eliminated.  In the end, the mechanical Cylons decided to incorporate many facets of humanity, thanks to their assimilation of Baltar and became all the more deadly for it.

That's just the backstory.

So, in the main story of the show, the commander of Galactica is Boxey, now called Orin (and not Troy).  The president, Mara, and the council decide that after so many years of peace, Galactica should be deactivated.  It is and, of course, this is when the Cylons strike.  As the Galactica is about to be destroyed once and for all, the Cylon Central Controller orders a retreat.  They then communicate with the Colonials and order them to surrender.

Orin refuses, of course, and launches a bunch of new Vipers.  They fight well, but the new Cylons are too strong.  In the battle, a water ship is damaged and a large chunk of ice forms.  The Colonials push it into the Basestar and it's destroyed.  Their cover blown, the Colonials again gather up a ragtag fleet and search for Earth.

Cylon Homeworld

Epilogue: on the Cylon homeworld, we see their mechanized might and then we see their Central Controller: Richard Frakkin' Hatch!  And his eyes glow Cylon red!  Da-da-dummmm!

After the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001, Bryan Singer departed the production to work on X2: X-Men United and Fox passed on the series in favor of Joss Whedon's Firefly.  They felt the story of a sneak attack was a bit too close to home.  This iteration of Battlestar Galactica was, for all intents and purposes, dead and all of those sets you see above were trashed.  Literally.

Here's a lengthy interview that the Tombs of Kobol guy did with Singer's partner, Tom DeSanto.

And that's it.  A BSG show we'll never see, I guess.


UPDATED:

Thanks to Daniel on my Facebook page for reminding me about Richard Hatch's nearly one-man effort in the late '90s to get a new series on the air.  I saw the concept trailer he made a while back and had trouble finding it online for some time.  But, hey!  A new search turned it up quickly.  Check out all the OG BSG glory:

Killing Time: Godzilla and Spore

If you follow my Twitter account, you know that on the weekends, my son and I watch movies.  Usually we're working our way through the Godzilla franchise.  Sometimes it's Gamera, the Harryhausen classics, '50s scifi B-movies or something else.  Usually Godzilla, though.

That's my son two years ago in his Godzilla costume with sound effects t-shirt.  Pretty sweet.

I'm also a fan of Electronic Arts and Maxis.  They've made SimCity, The Sims and their most epic game, Spore.  In it, you can create cellular life, act as its intelligent designer and help it evolve, make it become a sentient tribe, then nation, then civilization and then space-faring race.  You can design animals, vehicles, buildings and entire worlds.

I think you see where this is going.

Yes, we made a planet full of Godzilla monsters.

My son and I worked to recreate many of the "kaiju" from the Toho films in the game.  Here's a collage of some of the best "good guy" monsters we made:

Clockwise from top-left: Rodan, Mothra, Anguirus (Angilas), Minilla (Minya), Baragon and Godzilla.  Click to enlarge.

And here's a collage of our favorite "bad guy" monsters we made:

Clockwise from top-left: Battra, Keizer King Ghidorah, Hedorah, Gigan, King Ghidorah, Space Godzilla and Destoroyah.  Click to enlarge.

Oh, there are "mecha" versions, too:

MechaGodzilla on the left; Mecha-King Ghidorah on the right.  Click to enlarge.  Other "kaiju" in here: Manda, Kumonga, Kamacuras, Zilla, Ebirah, Orga, Mothra Larva, Megaguirus, Megalon, King Caesar, Biollante ...

Now, you can't have a bunch of monsters like this without a city to smash.  I built a big one (you'll see it soon).  I populated it with a race of beings I called "Fle'ers," because they're always running away, you see?  Here are some of the people:

The soldier is inserted in the game as a "captain" so I could outfit him with a weapon to use, futilely, against the monsters.  The citizens are colored red after those poor Star Trek security bastards.  Dr. Serizawa (complete with eyepatch) is the scientist who provides instructions, takes your technology, etc.

Here are some of the vehicles I made:

(Click to enlarge)  Watch Invasion of Astro-Monster.  That Xilien ship is a dead ringer.  I'm particularly proud of the Super X1.  Lots of detail there (you'll see more in the video below).  The rocket truck was big fun, too.  Now the maser cannon I'm really pleased with, unfortunately, you can't make land vehicles shoot beam weapons in the game.  Didn't look right to have it launching missiles.

There are other vehicles, too.  They are all altered versions of ones available from Maxis. (The buildings, too.)

OK, enough of that.  Here's a video I made of the big "Galactic Adventure" I constructed on our monster planet, Toho.  The player is Jet Jaguar and you'll see what he faces in the video below:

(You can turn off the annotations if they annoy you.  Just click the little red word balloon.)

I hope you enjoyed it.